1. Dogs will tilt their heads and try to understand every word you say. Cats look you straight in the eyes and know exactly what you said then will ignore you and take a nap.
2. Cats don't need a leash to go for a walk.
3. When you come home from work, your dog will be happy and lick your face. Cats remember and will still be mad at you for leaving in the first place.
4. Dogs will give you unconditional love until the day they die. Cats will make you pay for every mistake you've ever made since the day you were born.
5. A dog knows when you're sad. And he'll try to comfort you. Cats know you will get over it and thus they don't care how you feel, as long as you remember where the can opener is.
6. Dogs will bring you your slippers. Cats are convinced you can find your own slippers but just to let you know they too know where you put them cats will drop a dead mouse in your slippers.
7. When you take them for a ride, dogs will sit on the seat next to you. Cats have to have their own private basket, or they won't go at all.
8. Dogs will come when you call them. And they'll be happy. Cats will have someone take a message and get back to you if they are interested in what you have for them.
9. Dogs will play fetch with you all day long. Cats know if you throw away a stick or ball you don’t want it so it is dumb for them to bring it back to you.
10. Dogs will wake you up if the house is on fire. Cats know the dog will do this so they will quietly sneak out the back door.
MY PHOTO
I am the current writer of this blog
Monday, August 2, 2010
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Basic Rules for Dogs Who Have a Yard To Protect
NEWSPAPERS: If you have to go to the bathroom while playing in the front yard, always use the newspaper that's placed in the driveway every morning for that purpose.
VISITORS: Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs. Charge across the room, barking loudly and leap playfully on this person. If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick its face and growl gently to show your concern.
BARKING: Because you are a dog, you are expected to bark. So bark -- a lot. Your owners will be very happy to hear you protecting their house. Especially late at night while they are sleeping safely in their beds. There is no more secure feeling for a human than to keep waking up in the middle of the night and hearing your protective bark, bark, bark...
LICKING: Always take a BIG drink from your water dish immediately before licking your human. Humans prefer clean tongues. Be ready to fetch your human a towel.
HOLES: Rather than digging a BIG hole in the middle of the yard and upsetting your human, dig a lot of smaller holes all over the yard so they won't notice. If you arrange a little pile of dirt on one side of each hole, maybe they'll think it's gophers. There are never enough holes in the ground. Strive daily to do your part to help correct this problem.
DOORS: The area directly in front of a door is always reserved for the family dog to sleep.
THE ART OF SNIFFING: Humans like to be sniffed. Everywhere. It is your duty, as the family dog, to accommodate them.
DINING ETIQUETTE: Always sit under the table at dinner, especially when there are guests, so you can clean up any food that falls on the floor. It's also a good time to practice your sniffing.
HOUSEBREAKING: Housebreaking is very important to humans, so break as much of the house as possible.
GOING FOR WALKS: Rules of the road: When out for a walk with your master or mistress, never go to the bathroom on your own lawn.
COUCHES: It is perfectly permissible to lie on the new couch after all your humans have gone to bed.
PLAYING: If you lose your footing while chasing a ball or stick, use the flower bed to absorb your fall so you don't injure yourself.
CHASING CATS: When chasing cats, make sure you never--- quite--- catch them. It spoils all the fun.
CHEWING: Make a contribution to the fashion industry. ...Eat a shoe.
VISITORS: Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs. Charge across the room, barking loudly and leap playfully on this person. If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick its face and growl gently to show your concern.
BARKING: Because you are a dog, you are expected to bark. So bark -- a lot. Your owners will be very happy to hear you protecting their house. Especially late at night while they are sleeping safely in their beds. There is no more secure feeling for a human than to keep waking up in the middle of the night and hearing your protective bark, bark, bark...
LICKING: Always take a BIG drink from your water dish immediately before licking your human. Humans prefer clean tongues. Be ready to fetch your human a towel.
HOLES: Rather than digging a BIG hole in the middle of the yard and upsetting your human, dig a lot of smaller holes all over the yard so they won't notice. If you arrange a little pile of dirt on one side of each hole, maybe they'll think it's gophers. There are never enough holes in the ground. Strive daily to do your part to help correct this problem.
DOORS: The area directly in front of a door is always reserved for the family dog to sleep.
THE ART OF SNIFFING: Humans like to be sniffed. Everywhere. It is your duty, as the family dog, to accommodate them.
DINING ETIQUETTE: Always sit under the table at dinner, especially when there are guests, so you can clean up any food that falls on the floor. It's also a good time to practice your sniffing.
HOUSEBREAKING: Housebreaking is very important to humans, so break as much of the house as possible.
GOING FOR WALKS: Rules of the road: When out for a walk with your master or mistress, never go to the bathroom on your own lawn.
COUCHES: It is perfectly permissible to lie on the new couch after all your humans have gone to bed.
PLAYING: If you lose your footing while chasing a ball or stick, use the flower bed to absorb your fall so you don't injure yourself.
CHASING CATS: When chasing cats, make sure you never--- quite--- catch them. It spoils all the fun.
CHEWING: Make a contribution to the fashion industry. ...Eat a shoe.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN CAT'S LIFE AND DOG'S LIFE
The Life of a Cat
Day 283 Of My Captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair; must try this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
*********************************************************
The Life of a Dog
8:00 am - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 am - Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
11:30 am - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
12:00 noon - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
1:00 pm - Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!
4:00 pm - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
5:00 pm - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5:30 pm - Oh Boy! Mom! My favorite!
6:00 pm - Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6:30 pm - Oh Boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!
Day 283 Of My Captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair; must try this on their bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
*********************************************************
The Life of a Dog
8:00 am - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 am - Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
11:30 am - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
12:00 noon - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
1:00 pm - Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!
4:00 pm - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
5:00 pm - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5:30 pm - Oh Boy! Mom! My favorite!
6:00 pm - Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6:30 pm - Oh Boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!
Friday, May 2, 2008
COMPUTER CAT CRASH
I am having problems posting Sadie's blog today.
Something has crashed on my computer and the mouse is missing. . .
Belly stroke clears problem. Now to get the bleading stopped. (Moral of story: Never use a bare hand to tickle a sleeping cat's.)
Something has crashed on my computer and the mouse is missing. . .
Belly stroke clears problem. Now to get the bleading stopped. (Moral of story: Never use a bare hand to tickle a sleeping cat's.)
Friday, April 25, 2008
I WOULD LIKE TO DEVELOP A CAT LOVE’S NETWORK.
Recently I received an email from my daughter with an invitation to join Yuwie. After looking at it, at her recommendation, I joined but then tried to understand what it was I joined. After becoming totally confused and receiving several emails from strangers wanting to be my friend I called my daughter and asked her what it was. She said she didn’t know either and she had not received all the emails.
Finally I wrote to Yuwie support and asked them. I received, in part, the following reply, “Yuwie is a social networking site that pays its users. We share our advertising revenue with our members… Basically we pay for page views, yours and those of your referrals.”
The best I can understand is it is a way for people with common interests to maintain contact and pass information. They have people who advertise on their site and when someone visits a member’s page they pay that member part of the commission they receive from the advertiser for showing the page.
There is a profile page and after people read the profile page if they share common interests they can invite them to be a friend. I received over 45 requests to be a friend but after looking at their profile pages I don’t think most of them read my profile page because I could not find any common interests. My daughter said she did not fill in the profile page and that may be the reason she did not get all those requests.
After all that is said I come to the point. It might be fun to develop a group of friends who share my love for cats. We can swap stories, pictures, advice, and just have fun. We may make a little money along the way and that is ok with me because cat food costs money. If making money does not interest you that is fine because you could donate any money you make to a cat shelter because they could sure use it. They need to buy cat food too.
You can learn more by going to http://r.yuwie.com/wa6ohp and view the video.
Finally I wrote to Yuwie support and asked them. I received, in part, the following reply, “Yuwie is a social networking site that pays its users. We share our advertising revenue with our members… Basically we pay for page views, yours and those of your referrals.”
The best I can understand is it is a way for people with common interests to maintain contact and pass information. They have people who advertise on their site and when someone visits a member’s page they pay that member part of the commission they receive from the advertiser for showing the page.
There is a profile page and after people read the profile page if they share common interests they can invite them to be a friend. I received over 45 requests to be a friend but after looking at their profile pages I don’t think most of them read my profile page because I could not find any common interests. My daughter said she did not fill in the profile page and that may be the reason she did not get all those requests.
After all that is said I come to the point. It might be fun to develop a group of friends who share my love for cats. We can swap stories, pictures, advice, and just have fun. We may make a little money along the way and that is ok with me because cat food costs money. If making money does not interest you that is fine because you could donate any money you make to a cat shelter because they could sure use it. They need to buy cat food too.
You can learn more by going to http://r.yuwie.com/wa6ohp and view the video.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
SAD NEWS
This is Bill writing this post to pass on some sad news.
After the last post Sadie wrote somehow she managed to get outside while I was leaving for the night and she and Evinrude managed to get together. The result was five of the most beautiful kittens you ever saw. I helped deliver them and was there through the whole time they were growing and when they reached 9 weeks they each received an operation so they would not add to the cat population explosion then I found homes for each one. Sadie also received an operation.
A few days after the operation I let here go outside with me and she would stick with me constantly. Dottie, my wife, did not want her in the house so she would have to be locked in the office every time I went in.
One night I put her in the office as I had done every night but somehow, like before she slipped out as I was leaving. The next morning she was not in the office and as I searched for her I found her lying in the neighbor’s yard. The neighbor has two large huskies and they will kill cats that get into their yard so I lost Sadie.
You don't need to tell me I know I should have been more careful and it was my fault.
Sense loosing her it took me a few weeks before I was even able to return to the office and even longer before I was able to write this blog post. I loved her and I miss her.
I am going to try to keep up the post in her memory as much as possible.
After the last post Sadie wrote somehow she managed to get outside while I was leaving for the night and she and Evinrude managed to get together. The result was five of the most beautiful kittens you ever saw. I helped deliver them and was there through the whole time they were growing and when they reached 9 weeks they each received an operation so they would not add to the cat population explosion then I found homes for each one. Sadie also received an operation.
A few days after the operation I let here go outside with me and she would stick with me constantly. Dottie, my wife, did not want her in the house so she would have to be locked in the office every time I went in.
One night I put her in the office as I had done every night but somehow, like before she slipped out as I was leaving. The next morning she was not in the office and as I searched for her I found her lying in the neighbor’s yard. The neighbor has two large huskies and they will kill cats that get into their yard so I lost Sadie.
You don't need to tell me I know I should have been more careful and it was my fault.
Sense loosing her it took me a few weeks before I was even able to return to the office and even longer before I was able to write this blog post. I loved her and I miss her.
I am going to try to keep up the post in her memory as much as possible.
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